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No worries, tres leches cake has three.

Wednesday Feb 16, 2005.     By Misty Tosh

Food Feed

Sweets are such a mortal sin for me. I can never enjoy just one slice of dessert; it has to be a full shove down of half the cake No, it can't be a simple scoop of ice cream: Let's go with the gigantor-size banana split, extra caramel, extra chocolate.

That's always been my sick style and maybe it's because most cakes, cookies and pies aren't that satisfying, mostly made up of phony icing, cake box mixes and icky canned fruit. They always leave me in a rage and wanting more. But this is not the case with what God created as the queen bee, master of all master desserts, the incomparable tres leches cake.

Sadly, the best I've ever tasted is a plane ride away, at a small Latin restaurant in the Chelsea area of Manhattan, tucked away in a tiny hideaway called El Cocotero. When the sultry waiter presented it, I panicked for a second because it was cut into a square shape, and I'd only ever associated the wonder with a wedge-style version. But after one bite, I ripped it away from my dining buddy and practically shrieked, "Get your own damn cake!" I went back four times over the course of the week (solely for the cake, of course), and I loved the way they sprinkled fresh summer berries over the homemade whipped cream topping.

Nothing in Chicago has even remotely compared to the NYC version, but I have come impressively close at my newest haunt, Kristoffer's Cafe and Bakery. Located right in the heart of Pilsen, Kristoffer's has cornered the three-milk market for me. Served several different ways (vanilla, chocolate, coconut, caramel and Kaluah), this super little South Side find has pretty much perfected tres leches cake.

This intensely moist and buttery cake is soaked in three different kinds of milk, usually sweetened condensed milk, evaporated milk and heavy cream. (Of course, like most incredible bakers, owner/baker Cristina Chavarria will not commit to any certain milk for the recipe, and just pulls the 'ole one-two, half nod, half shake move. I'm sure she's terrified that tres leches thieves are on the make.) Then, coated with homemade whipped cream (I had the Kaluah flavored version), it's tossed in the refrigerator for hours until it has properly absorbed the milk. When it finally hits the table, the chilled cake has a heavenly sponge-like texture, almost slurpably wet with sweetened milk.

It'll literally leave your mouth agape with its unique taste. The kaluah coffee flavor only pops out slightly in the whipped topping, and the final kablamm! in your mouth is at the end, when the little coffee bean pops and crunches around with the moist cake, the oozing sugared milk and the velvety whipped cream. Bring on the milk.

The Final Rave: Seriously, in addition to the cake, order a cool dozen tamales while you're there. They come out smoking hot, packed with cheese and bundled in a cornhusk. Just $1.50 each and hauntingly addictive.

KEEP IT GOING:

Read It: Powell's Bookstore
Flop down into a comfy chair and ride across the wilds of South America with Che Guevara in "The Motorcycle Diaries." If you can't find time for the book, you could always rent it and say you read it. Slacker.

Eat It: Lalo's
Come the weekend, chow down on a hunk of tres leches cake in the upstairs restaurant and then head to the basement, where all the crazy hot Latinos dance like they mean it.

Drink It: Circuit
Had one too many Latin Lovers? Not the man, the cocktail, you fool. Head to this rowdy dance club on one of their Latin theme nights and try to keep your wits about you: Some of those girls may be boys!

Get Crazy With It: Go scuba diving
Continue the mad hunt for the best tres leches cake in the world on this tiny little Nicaraguan island in the middle of the ocean. Start the day by taking diving classes and end it with an icy cold one and a wedge of three milk.